inter-city train journey -
a rattling window top
shuts itself

—Alan Summers

Previously published in Presence haiku magazine (U.K.), September 2001

About the author: Alan's haiku and poetry is published in over 60 anthologies, and a number of languages. He regularly reads, performs, and workshops from venues as diverse as possible including shop windows; inner city rainforests; cliff tops; to the more orthodox places...on occasion. His website is:

Contact: alan at withwords dot org dot uk


Responses to the haiku for 2 July 2004 by Alan Summers

    2004-07-02 07:03:21

    summer breeze
    a quiet house
    bursting at the seams

    john tiong chunghoo
    2004-07-04 01:32:04

    widow's death
    her bamboo bell rattles
    through the night

    lana b
    2004-07-04 06:59:27

    lost & found
    grandma's wedding ring
    with loose stone

    Sue Schneider
    2004-07-06 15:29:43

    This haiku brought immediate memories of the ride on the Circumvisuviano inner-city 'train' that runs between Naples and Sorrento. We have knicknammed it the bone-rattler. You must have ridden it to come up with these words.

    bob richardson (orgbob at webtv dot net)
    2004-07-06 19:18:29

    neighbor's death, behind locked doors -
    summer breeze
    through open windows

    paul m.
    2004-07-19 15:14:38

    So many ways to see (or be) that window. Speaks very much of city living. An excellent poem!

    2004-07-20 01:14:39


    Thanks for all the kind comments and complementary haiku!

    all my best,



    Narayanan Raghunathan (mahashishta at hotmail dot com)
    2004-08-04 11:49:50

    Thanks for this powerful Haiku Alan.

    crowded train~
    through the maze of faces
    a distant smile~

    train rattles on~
    stink from the toilet
    people drink coffee~

    train corridor~
    ugly old beggar
    covers his face
    with a dirty cloth~

    bob richardson (orgbob at webtv dot net)
    2004-09-07 20:17:41

    bonsai tree
    on the cliff
    overlooking the clouds


    inter-city train journey -
    a rattling window top
    shuts itself

    2004-09-08 02:45:47


    the rain ceases
    so I leave the sycamore. . .
    one more kingfisher


    bob richardson (orgbob at webtv dot net)
    2005-01-15 13:33:02

    rainy day journey
    through my bedroom window
    the setting sun seems down


    2005-01-22 04:50:36


    Dear Bob,

    Thank you for your bedroom window haiku which, alongside all the above train haiku, reminded me of my sleeper train haiku, so here it is!


    the night train passes
    along the mountain trail
    garlic snores

    Alan Summers

    le train de nuit passe
    sur une voie de montagne
    ronflements d'ail

    (French trans. Serge Tome - Temps Libre)


    another rain day
    I travel on foot
    to the train station

    Alan Summers


    prado chekov
    2005-09-19 17:41:15

    morning rain
    i think of father's voice
    until it stops

    2005-09-20 01:03:47

    Dear Prado Chekov,

    A very moving haiku. It's open enough so I get my own response from it, and reminds me of my haiku that I wrote after my Father's funeral.

    the rain
    almost a friend
    this funeral

    Alan Summers

    2009-02-02 15:51:29

    beneath the underpass
    stalled morning commute--
    one, no two dark pigeons